The sex

Prostitution is illegal in Vietnam. So are many other things like more than two adults and a child older than 5 on a motorbike. These prohibitions are routinely ignored. With the motorbikes the violations are obvious and everywhere. With the prostitution it seems to be nearly as obvious.

Massage advertising is everywhere. Some of it is surely legitimate. Much of it is a front for prostitution or massage and prostitution. From what I've gathered some prostitutes are intent on delivering massage with sex.

For the ear picking I expected to be in a street level open front shop where the sidewalk was visible. That is what the ear picking videos I found on YouTube showed. The shop I went to had the barber chairs at ground level and a glass storefront. When it was determined I was there for ear picking we took an elevator to the 3rd floor and ended up in a small intimate room with two paintings of partially nude women on one wall and a large flat screen TV on the wall at my feet. The TV was off while I was in the room. If I hadn't had a woman friend with me recording the ear picking I believe there might have been some very erotic programming playing. Listen to the background music in the video segment. Somewhat seductive, no? With sharp instruments in your ear piping in death metal probably wouldn't be a good idea anyway but still! My videographer and I agreed that if she hadn't been there I probably would have been offered "additional services." We also agreed a lot of sex has likely happened in that room.

One of the things I like to do when I visit some place is walk around. It gives a perspective of the area that riding in cabs or driving cars just don't offer.

I've walked from my hotel quite often. Any walks after about 2:00 PM are inevitably interrupted by offers of massage. Offers are made by a woman who is usually attempting to hand over a card or advertising leaflet. As the day progresses into evening and then night the pitch often involves the woman following along for a bit repeating the offer.

About early evening, maybe 5:00 PM and later, usually the offer includes "special massage", "happy ending" or quite simply "I fuck you good". A few women have offered massage while following along beside me and even hanging onto my arm. After repeating several times that I really don't want a massage they've sighed somewhat resignedly and said "okay no massage just fuck you then". From that I get the perspective the massage part is important to them.

In addition to the women there are guys on motorbikes on the corners. During the day they offer to ferry you around town. In the evening they offer the same and, after being turned down, they go to their second line of business and offer women. Some have had cards with pictures of women on them, others have shown photos on their smartphones and still others have said "you come look, no charge unless you see girl you like, you don't like I bring another girl".

The women I've spoken with here seem quite resigned to this. They expect that all men will cheat and "it is just a part of life here." They all have girlfriends whose husbands have one or multiple lovers or who make use of the many sex services. Seems like a pretty rough place for a woman to find happiness and be secure in a relationship.